I’m sitting in the living room (the ethernet cable i have doesn’t stretch further) and Anna is watching Mr Romance. As a result, I have my headphones on and listen to Autechre at damage-inducing levels.
I just can’t stand reality-tv shit. Seriously, I can’t. It’s a thing I have where I have to walk out of the room and either smoke or cover my ears and go “na-na-na-na” until my retardation-levels have gone down sufficiently.
what can we learn from the above images? we learn this:
1) ATM machines run Windows NT and occasionaly get tired of giving us our money and say “fuck you” for no apparent reason other than hating their existence. (try being an old Windows box mounted in a hole and see how you like it)
2) Yes, it is possible to write quite random things if you didn’t plan ahead, and should you find yourself in front of a wall with a spraycan handy this might be the result. Or maybe burri-burri-burritooo?
3) Wear sunscreen, for fucks sake. this happens to be Anna, but it could be you!
4) There were three of us, and no-one knew that you should not connect two batteries serially, but rather earth one of the starter-cables. Oh well, you live and you learn. (In the meantime you are very frustrated.)
5) I happened upon a voting booth at the library and snuck in to cast my vote on the most interesting alternative. (At least on the national level. In the municipal and regional elections I voted for the least evil/sucky/assramming party). I’m voting for the Swedish Pirate Party cause they actually have a chance to get some radical changes through. Hopefully they’ll get above 4% and will be able to have the other parties eating pirate pussy to get the deciding votes.
6) Idle hands are the devils watercolour painting brushes.
1) Walking home from Kellys the other evening, a girl asked me for a lighter. After lighting her cigarette she asked me if “anything was the matter, you look so depressed and angry.”
2) Standing behind the counter at work. A guy comes in with his daughter, and the daughter askes my co-worker miranda if I’m her dad.
3) Farting in public doesn’t seem like such a big deal anymore.
One of the most popular features of the computers in the store (Macbooks & iMacs) is the built in iSight in combination with Photobooth. It’s not that the effects you get in the application are new or rad in any sense the kids might use those terms, but rather it’s the braindead sillyness akin to warped mirrors that is so alluring.
At some point I’m going to create a gallery of all the images customers (and employees) have taken of themselves; hopefully to much amusement of all involved, and with as few lawsuits as possible from ridiculed parties.
What I do on the blog is whine, complain, act grumpy, and occasionaly poke fun at the disabled and philosophically challenged. Build and they will come is a bible quote (although I last remember seeing it in Eight legged freaks. quite an entertaining movie, with a lot of large spiders and lack of excitement.) and judging from the search strings leading to monocultured.com, my flock is slowly, trickling, making their way here.
I think i might be overestimating the streatchy-ness of my streatchy jeans. In combination with me sitting still most of the day and doing nothing but eating and playing computer games, the assilicious-ness of them soon will turn to flubber-container-ness.
So, I’ve been looking at gyms. Crap they’re expensive. And it still seems, well, extremely boring to do that kind of things, whassisname, oh right – “excercise.”
Got back to GBG a week ago, and it was a wonderful delivery from excessive heat. I landed smack dab in a two-day party that some folk threw together in the Valand yard, and although I was a bit too off to participate much, I had a great time photographing people from my studio window. Me and a poster of miffy were hiding in the darkness, throwing peanuts at all the people who were pissing behind the dumpster as there were no bathrooms available. (At a party with 300-400 guests who were all drinking beer as if they were trying to bail the Titanic. I’m still working on my metaphors).
Also, the comb-back hair-style I’ve taken to seems to be the official one. It makes me look slightly like an uppety twat, but at least my forehead gets some fresh air.
With temperatures in the 40s, and with humidity that can only be described as totally fucked upatlantic, it was with desperate joy that I received todays short storm. And it really was a storm – during 30 minutes it literally poured down, making cars go “sploosh” through deep puddles.
Now it’s warm as hell again, and twice as humid. It’s bloody unbearable. I’m actually dripping with sweat and my pants feel like I’ve pissed myself!
—————update—
Here’s a video of the rain from the increadible stifling heat of the office. This is some ten minutes into the storm; it’s worth remembering that just ten minutes prior the temperature was in the almost-forties and not a drop of water in sight (if you don’t count all the miserable sweat, of course).
Because beauty belongs to the world, I tough I’d share some self portraits.
From the top:
1) Mateusz sits in a really warm pizza place and would look even more haunted where it not for the miracles of image editing.
2) In Poland you can still smoke almost everywhere (but not train stations, go figure). In fact, I’m smoking right now!
3) The heat (today it’s 36C in the shade) has driven me to extreme measures, and apart from walking around sort of butt naked, i comb my hair back to give what little brain I have left some relief. Image taken in slightly warped two-part mirror; my head really isn’t as big as all that.
Today is the first day that the weather has relented somewhat. It’s still almost 30 in the shade (that’s 86 degrees Fahrenheit for you metric-challenged) and the humidity is still horrible, but it’s getting better. (Or I’m getting accustomed to it)
Whichever way, I’m not going to Poland in the summer again. Ever, ever.
Caught a cold in Warsaw, and today is the first day that I’m not actually making diesel-engine sounds when I breath. Yesterday it was 48 degrees in the sun (118F). What the flying hell on a shit!
I’m keeping indoors until sundown. (Yesterday, after the sun went down, it was still 30 outside, btw.) Tomorrow onwards to Krakow to meet up a cousin.
As a result of my hiding, I’ve been online a lot and downloaded a pdf of Neil Strauss “The Game” — his biography of pickup artists and his way to becoming one as well. Fun read.
Other than that. I still haven’t found a good PC app to resize & crop images, so if anyone has any to recommend, let me know. I do take pictures occasionally, but can’t be arsed to download the drivers that would let windows recognize a stupid SD card. Stupid computer.
I’ve always had trouble with my own haircut (and look in general): Occasionally I can appreciate the fluff, but asked how I’d like it cut, I just go meh. This presented a problem today as I didn’t know how to say “meh” in Polish, and ended up saying “just don’t make me overly friendly.”
Fair enough — it’s hotter today than yesterday, and I’m happy sheading at least part of that dead ferret which had been occupying my head for the past three months. Besides, it’s nice to go to a fancy schmancy hairdresser just cause I can afford it here; Services are one of the few things that still are cheap.
I’m in a rut and have walked up and down the same street I always walk up and down; This “autistic tourist” approach applies to wherever I travel, so I guess I’m just a very rut-oriented kind of person. Who wuddathunkit.
Got me a Polish cell today, so I can be contacted at number +48 698 861 180. I might check the usual number from time to time, but since it’s a painful process to change the simcard in the phone I got, that won’t be too often.
