Author: Mateusz
some pictures that don’t have to do with much else
testies!
you’ve prolly seen this somewhere else, but here goes: woman pulls off a guys testicle, tries to eat it, chokes and spits it out. someone else returnes the testicle saying “this belongs to you”.
read more here: news.bbc.co.uk
i didn’t know that this was possible. she must have been rather upset. good way to scare other people though – i once ripped a guys nut off. wanna buy me a drink?
you would not believe the day i’ve had. litterarly.
seriously, there’s some messed up crap going on that i’m not going to go in to. i can’t relate to it because it’s bloody surreal, and if you can relate to it i’m very sympathetic to your fucked up situation.
as an alternative i present some images to you from my previous saturday that left me hung over and slightly concussed all of sunday. in no apparent order:
this was the spring party at valand and it took place at berg 211 – it was a bit too far away from the city center to become a staggering crowd of stinking artists, but we made do. and the locale is stunning.
four days ago i was dreaming about loosing a tooth, and the more i poked at it with my tounge, the bigger it became and the more it split into fragments. it became so bad that i had trouble talking. when i finally started pulling pieces out, they turned out to be glass fragments – such as you might expect from a broken bottle.
any interpretations?
you would not believe the day i’ve had. litterarly.
seriously, there’s some messed up crap going on that i’m not going to go in to. i can’t relate to it because it’s bloody surreal, and if you can relate to it i’m very sympathetic to your fucked up situation.
as an alternative i present some images to you from my previous saturday that left me hung over and slightly concussed all of sunday. in no apparent order:
this was the spring party at valand and it took place at berg 211 – it was a bit too far away from the city center to become a staggering crowd of stinking artists, but we made do. and the locale is stunning.
four days ago i was dreaming about loosing a tooth, and the more i poked at it with my tounge, the bigger it became and the more it split into fragments. it became so bad that i had trouble talking. when i finally started pulling pieces out, they turned out to be glass fragments – such as you might expect from a broken bottle.
any interpretations?
you would not believe the day i’ve had. litterarly.
seriously, there’s some messed up crap going on that i’m not going to go in to. i can’t relate to it because it’s bloody surreal, and if you can relate to it i’m very sympathetic to your fucked up situation.
as an alternative i present some images to you from my previous saturday that left me hung over and slightly concussed all of sunday. in no apparent order:
this was the spring party at valand and it took place at berg 211 – it was a bit too far away from the city center to become a staggering crowd of stinking artists, but we made do. and the locale is stunning.
four days ago i was dreaming about loosing a tooth, and the more i poked at it with my tounge, the bigger it became and the more it split into fragments. it became so bad that i had trouble talking. when i finally started pulling pieces out, they turned out to be glass fragments – such as you might expect from a broken bottle.
any interpretations?
you would not believe the day i’ve had. litterarly.
seriously, there’s some messed up crap going on that i’m not going to go in to. i can’t relate to it because it’s bloody surreal, and if you can relate to it i’m very sympathetic to your fucked up situation.
as an alternative i present some images to you from my previous saturday that left me hung over and slightly concussed all of sunday. in no apparent order:
this was the spring party at valand and it took place at berg 211 – it was a bit too far away from the city center to become a staggering crowd of stinking artists, but we made do. and the locale is stunning.
four days ago i was dreaming about loosing a tooth, and the more i poked at it with my tounge, the bigger it became and the more it split into fragments. it became so bad that i had trouble talking. when i finally started pulling pieces out, they turned out to be glass fragments – such as you might expect from a broken bottle.
any interpretations?
det stora sveket – alla mina gamla mac-prylar ska bort
this is a repost of a ad i put in for all my old apple stuff. i post it here mostly because i put too much time to let it linger. if you’re interested, i refer you to this page: www.99.se/mac
–[snip]–
ack ja, ack ja. min mor ska flytta ut ur sin fyra och har bett mig och min bror att tömma lägenheten på våra gamla saker. det mesta jag haft där har redan rykt – mina hemgjorda tshirts, en samling serietidningar och reklamblad från -92 jag av någon anledning trodde skulle komma till nytta.
det enda jag hade sparat var mina gamla mac-prylar. det var med ett tungt hjärta jag slängde skalet till en mac plus förra året (jag hade så storslagna planer), och nu är det dags för resten av bohaget. jag har inget lager eller annan plats jag kan stuva undan allt i, och i ärlighetens namn så vet jag innerst inne att jag aldrig kommer att restaurera det och göra en raid av de 20MB scsi-diskarna jag har liggande. den med vuxendomens bittra insikt växande uppgivelsen gör att jag nu vill bli av med alla de här klenoderna till någon som bättre kan ta till vara på dem. jag ska försöka redogöra för mitt uppskattade värde av prylarna, samt det (förmodligen mer realistiska) värdet, men jag vill ha något för det oavsett – jag har suttit på mac sedan farsan köpte en plus -86, och vill inte bara ge bort det till någon som i sin tur slänger allt utom strömkabeln.
det här är en illustrativ bild av mig när jag skriver dessa rader:
om vi tar och börjar med datorerna, så har vi först och främst en pimpad mac plus. pimpad i det här fallet innebär att den utbyggt minne (fyra 512kb moduler om jag minns rätt) för att assistera en 8Mhz processor. den saknar skruvarna som håller fast baksidan (jag plockade isär den på fyllan för att komplettera med delar från en annan plus, och tappade bort skruvarna), men funkade nicely när jag senast bootade den in i OS 6.0.7.
minns att jag spelade leasure suit larry och dark castle på den när farsan inte var hemma, samt möjligtvis hade jag någon sorts prepubertal upplevelse med ‘mac playmate’, men det kan ha varit senare.
min första egna dator fick jag ta över när farsan köpte en quadra till sitt tryckeri: IIsi. med tillhörande a4-skärm (16 gråskala!). ack alla de retusheringar i photoshop 3 som jag gjorde av mina klasskamrater! jag minns bäst en bild av clara i min klass som jag var kär i där hon står iklädd en handduk, och jag med sexton grå-toner lyckades få henne att se oanständig ut. dessa minnen!
när jag började jobba som apple-tekniker fick jag ett bra pris på ram och maxade ut det till fenomenala 17Mb (1MB sitter på moderkortet) från föregående 3MB. jävlar vad det gick fortare, särskilt med ett nubus-kort med fpu (inkluderat!)
vänligen notera den fina smuts-gula färgen som de riktigt klassiska datorerna har. det kallas för patina.
sen har vi en IIcx som jag inte ens minns var jag fick tag på. möjligtvis från en kille som sålde på mig hela sin gamla mac-samling. (bland annat min första 14 tums färgskärm som kackade ut efter två månader)
en scanner är vad varje modern människa behöver, och med en state-of-the-art scanner för 256 gråskalor kan du inte misslyckas! jag har även programvaran i orginalkartong! (vänligen notera den gamla quicktime-loggan)
om du råkar sitta på en av de kanske fem IBM mainframe-datorer som finns i landet så uppskattar du säkert det här: ett 7 tums nubus-kort med interface och drivrutiner för att integrera vilken kompatibel mac som helst med militärens mainframe (tänk wargames). kostade på sin tid en sjuttio tusingar, men värdet kan ha minskat något sedan dess.
lagringsmedia är något självklart i dessa dagar, och det kan inte gå fel med externa scsi-diskar. tre chassin innehållandes två 20MB och en 40MB disk, och dessutom en syquest-enhet! mer utrymme än du någonsin vet att göra av med! (lådorna är i alla fall väldigt snygga) några syquest-skivor på 44MB följer med, och innehåller förmodligen min samlade kollektion av abandonware och de dikter jag skrev som deprimerad tonåring. (en guldgruva av ångest och underhållning alltså)
sen har vi så klart en hel drös med kablar; adb, scsi, nät, local-talk, audio, video. dessutom några möss, tangentbord, scsi-terminatorer, mikrofoner och två lösa scsi-diskar av okänt ursprung (förmodligen plockade ur den IIsi jag konstant uppgraderade)
jag gjorde några halsband av ram-minnen när jag var inne i min cyber-nörd period, och det är fritt fram för dig att göra samma sak. minnen finns i storlekar från 64KB upp till 256KB, och de är väldigt fina.
om du känner någon som jobbar på landstinget och är paranoid så kanske de skulle uppskatta att kunna låsa sina diskettstationer mot olaga uppdateringar av solitär. det här floppy-låset är nog det fulaste jag har i samlingen, mest för att det känns väldigt mycket pc. den perfekta presenten till någon du inte älskar särskilt mycket.
vad ska du då göra med dina nufunna skatter till datorer? frukta intet! till att börja med så kan du programmera lite i hypercard (väldigt snygg orginalkartong – apple har verkligen återvänt till sina rötter med de senaste macbook-lådorna), leka med aldus pagemaker, eller spela spel.
sim earth var det första spelet jag köpte. rent tekniskt sett så var det det första spelet jag övertalade min lillebror att köpa trots att han bara var sex år och inte gillade datorer. kommer på två floppys (en färg- och en sv/v-version), men den största behållningen är nog manualen, som väldigt ingående beskriver klimat, oceaniska strömmar och livets evolution. helt tokigt komplicerat. “spore” från början av nittiotalet.
en juvel i samlingen är såklart prince of persia i orginalkartong. ett av de snyggaste spelen någonsin, och enligt ryktet så är förpackningen så snygg att den ökar din sexuella dragningskraft med 400%.
allt det här är nerpackat i en låda från en rev-a imac:
och här är hela högen med grejjor. du behöver ett fordon för att forsla det här, alternativt kan tio personer dela upp allt mellan sig och bära det likt myror som just dödat en oskyldig och vacker fjäril och styckat upp kroppen. your choice.
hursomhelst. min mor ringde just och sa att hon har hyrt in en målare som kommer imorgon (2/6), och att hon förmodligen kommer att slänga allt då. om någon nappar på det här och vill ge en peng (vilken peng som helst nästan) så kan jag be henne flytta in det i vardagsrummet några dagar eller så.
om ingen är intresserad så kanske någon på återvinningsstationen kan gå förbi det i nästa vecka och få en flashback till sina egna gamla trolovade burkar och bli lite nostalgisk.
så: posta i tråden om ni har kommentarer, frågor, eller vill buda. alternativt kan ni ringa och motivera er. om jag inte svarar i telefon så sitter jag på krogen och begråter förlorad historia. jag är nere i göteborg, så om en go gubbe här ser mig på stan kan ni gärna klappa mig på axeln medömkande.
mateusz: 0739-474652
ps. allt det här finns i kungsängen, en liten bit från stockholm.
sexual amplitude test – what you sort of might want to know for your own twisted reasons
if i’m only tested enough times, i will at some point arrive at the answer to the age old question: who am i and what am i doing here. if only kirkegaard had access to the internet and under-grad studends conducting their research online, he might have been a slightly more jolly fellow.
this test took me a half hour or some such. if you want to know how i rank on some sort of ‘sexual amplitude’, here you go. then go and do the test yourself.
Test Scores
The following are the results from the tests that were just completed.
SES/SIS
You scored 45 on the Sexual Excitation Scale (SES).
The SES is a measure of one’s tendency to become easily sexually aroused. Scores range from a minimum of 20 to a maximum of 80. Higher scores indicate an increased proneness to become easily sexually excited. Results from past research put the general male population SES average between 57.2 and 58.0. The current average for this study is 57.9. Higher scores have been shown to be related to increased responsiveness to sexual stimuli, higher frequency of masturbation and greater number of sexual partners.
You scored 27 on the Sexual Inhibition – 1 Scale (SIS1).
The SIS1 is a measure of one’s tendency to be sexually inhibited due to fear of performance failure (i.e. inability to maintain an erection). Scores range from a minimum of 14 and a maximum of 56. Higher scores indicate an increased proneness to be fearful of losing one’s erection. On average, men in the general population score between 27.0 and 28.9 on the SIS1. The current average for this study is 28.5.
You scored 32 on the Sexual Inhibition – 2 Scale (SIS2).
The SIS2 is measure of one’s tendency to be sexually inhibited due to fear of possible negative outcomes from a sexual interaction (e.g. unwanted pregnancy, sexually transmitted infections, etc.). Scores range from a minimum of 11 and a maximum of 44. Higher scores indicate an increased proneness to lose sexual arousal due to threat of negative consequences. Average SIS2 scores for men in the general population range from 26.8 to 28.3. The current average for this study is 26.1. Men who score high on the SIS2 are more likely to avoid risky sexual behaviours (e.g. unprotected sex, greater number of partners, etc.)
SDI-2
You scored 26 on the Dyadic Subscale of the Sexual Desire Inventory – 2 (SDI-2).
You scored 12 on the Solitary Subscale of the Sexual Desire Inventory – 2 (SDI-2).
The Sexual Desire Inventory-2 is a measure of one’s interest in sexual activity (i.e. sexual desire). The Dyadic Subscale score captures desire for partner related activity and the Solitary Subscale captures desire for solo sexual activity (i.e. masturbation). Scores range from 0 to 62 for the Dyadic Subscale (DS) and from 0 to 25 on the Solitary Subscale (SS). There is no previous population data available for this measure. However, the current averages for women in this study are: DS – 37; SS – 9. The current averages for men in this study are: DS – 44; SS – 14.
TSO
Your average weekly Total Sexual Outlet is 3.
Your lifetime maximum Total Sexual Outlet is 9.
In the original Kinsey sex studies, Total Sexual Outlet (or amount of orgasms per week) was considered a good indicator of sexual drive. Kinsey reported that the average weekly TSO for unmarried women was 0.5, for married women was 2.2 and for men was 2.5. He suggested that a cutoff of a weekly TSO of 7 was evidence of a high sexual drive, with only 3% of men reporting a TSO of 8 or more. However, Kinsey’s data was collected in the 1940s and since then researchers have suggested that the results Kinsey reported far underestimate current patterns of TSOs. Additionally, researchers have concluded that TSO is not a good measure of sexual drive as there are far too many other factors that lead to high or low TSOs. The TSO was included in this study to provide data that may refute Kinsey’s claims. The current mean average weekly TSOs for men and women in this study are 5.6 and 5.2, respectively. The current mean average maximum weekly TSOs for men and women in this study are 10.9 and 7.3, respectively.
SCS
You scored 1.7 on the Sexual Compulsivity Scale (SCS).
The Sexual Compulsivity Scale is a measure of sexual preoccupation and difficulty managing sexual thoughts and behaviours. The scale is scored by summing all of your responses and dividing by 10 (the number of items). Scores range from 1 to 4 with greater numbers indicating increased sexual compulsivity. The average score on SCS for college males is 1.64 and for college females is 1.33. The current averages for males and females in this study are 1.52 and 1.27, respectively. Higher scores are related to increased sexual risk taking (i.e. unprotected sex with multiple partners) while lower scores are related to safer sexual practices.
DSFI
The Derogatis Sexual Functioning Inventory has various subscales:
You scored 23 on the Sexual Information Subscale.
This scale is a measure of your sexual knowledge. The minimum score is 0 and the maximum score is 26. The average scores for men and women in the original study were 21.2 and 21.3, respectively. The current average scores for men and women in this study are 20.5 and 21.8, respectively.
You scored 23 on the Sexual Experiences Subscale.
This scale measures the amount of different types of sexual experiences you have had. Scores range from 0 to 24 different types of sexual experiences. The average amounts for the men and women in the original study were 20.8 and 20.1, respectively. The current average amounts for men and women in this study are 20.4 and 20.2, respectively.
You scored 46 on the Sexual Attitudes Subscale.
This scale measures how liberal/conservative your sexual attitudes are. Score range from -60 to +60 with higher scores indicating a more liberal attitude. The average scores in the original study for men and women were +27.2 and +20.6, respectively. The current average scores for men and women in this study are +23.97 and +24.88, respectively.
You scored 11 on the Body Image Subscale.
This scale measures your satisfaction with your body. Scores range from 0 to 60 with higher numbers indicating less satisfaction. The average scores for men and women in the original study were 11.7 and 14.7, respectively. The current average scores for men and women in this study are 18.9 and 21.1, respectively.
You scored 5 on the Sexual Satisfaction Subscale.
This scale measures your satisfaction with your current sex life. Scores range from 0 to 10 with higher scores indicating greater satisfaction. The average scores for men and women in the original study were 7.8 and 8.9, respectively. The current average scores for men and women in this study are 7.6 and 7.4, respectively.
Please keep in mind that average scores from past research reported here are not necessarily current or representative of the entire population. Averages depend on the eras in which the research was conducted, the group of people tested and their demographic characteristics. As such, the results reported are not definitive. Our study will provide us with data about sexual desire, behaviours, attitudes and thoughts in the years 2006 and 2007.
If you scored higher or lower than the reported averages, your scores do not mean that you are dysfunctional. However, if you are concerned about some issues related to your sexuality and would like to speak to someone about them, please contact:
BC Centre for Sexual Medicine
Vancouver Coastal Health – VGH Site
Suite 500 – 575 West 8th Avenue
Echelon Building
Vancouver, BC, V5Z 1C6
Phone: (604) 875-8282
Fax: (604) 875-8249
Reception Hours:
8:00 am – 4:00 pm Monday to Friday
hitler: the peacemaker
petter send me a link to this: nobel peace price for hitler. sort of when saddam hussein got the keys to detroit.
how the times change, eh?